Otherwise known as hell. Especially when you are sick with a head cold that is going into your lungs. Since Saturday evening I have been getting sicker and sicker. Makes sense since I am the mom of a boy who is a few days ahead of me with the same thing. Poor kiddo. It's tough seeing him sick. He just turned 7 and is such a sweetie. He wakes up every night with a night terror, nightmare or just from sleep walking... In which he is not silent about at all.
Now that he is sick, and myself as well, there is just no sleep schedule right now. It's pretty much he and I take naps all the time!
Tonight as I lay here trying what my hubby suggested, NyQuil for colds & Flu, I got excited thinking I may get some relief or sleep at least. Nope. Ok, well... My nose has stopped dripping. That's awesome! Nothing like being woken up to water trickling down your face only to find out it's from your nose. Yuck!
The pain is my biggest problem. It's a nightmare. Detox bath, music, massage, oils, happy thoughts, prayers.... A blessing. It's the only thing I haven't tried.
It's so hard to explain. My breathing even hurts my ribs. I want to just sleep all the time because it's the only time I don't feel pain. It hurts to move and the more excercise I get the more my bones hurt.
Over the last few months I have been given a few "Lymie's " phone numbers to call. I think it's time I reach out. I'm starting to feel too overwhelmed by the pain, depression and lack of clear thinking. I need some answers. I need to hear that I can find a way to stay on top of this.
I have heard of so many different ways to treat Lyme it's starting to spin my head! Too much to gather right now. So much trial and error and researching. I already have so much on my plate with my kids, hubby, household duties and most of all, my calling at church. It gives me a great distraction but gives me little time to take care of myself the way I need to be right now. I am relying on the Lord to bless me to endure until I am released so I may finally move forward and focus more on my health. If I can just ge through until the end of January, I think I will be better? The holidays are so busy and being unwell I have already missed 3 baby showers, two game nights with friends, many church events, date nights with the hubby and any socializing with friends.
Biggest part is I am not awake for very long at a time and I miss out on so much time where I could be doing other things besides sleep. It's taking me forever to type this because I have to give my body a break from the pain.
I know this blog, for now, has been my way to vent. I try so hard to not complain or even mention the pain. I don't want to focus on it nor be the complaining friend or spouse. It's tough... Especially when it feels like someone is ripping you apart on the inside, or stabbing you with a knife or shocking you until you cave and drop down. Seriously, it's a nightmare I live every day. I have better times than others, sure... But right now is not one of them. So much to do and so little of me to do it.
I did my CT scan of my sinuses today. It was very quick and easy and no IV's were needed since we are not looking for a tumor. My next appointment is Monday with my ENT to talk about the biopsy to check wether or not my polyps are malignant or benign. That will be fun, I'm sure.
I feel content now with my venting, so I'm glad I got it out! Haha! I have to be up in 4 hours to get my daughter off to school for crazy hair day... Yippee. Until next time!! Love all of you!
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