Tuesday, March 10, 2015

Treatments with Tindamax. *** disclaimer: one icky part of Lyme*****

(What happened to my font??!!)
We have added Tindamax to my Doxycycline and it has increased the die-off of the bacteria.  I've been told that Tindamax helps to break down the biofilm communities that Lyme bacteria live in.  Biofilms are another way Lyme can hide.  Here is why I have a gross disclaimer above...  Skip the next paragraph if you have a sensitive tummy, or don't want to know all the gross parts of Lyme treatments.

**The biofilm communities are being broken down.  I am told that in my feces I should be able to see them.  Yes, that means a lot.  It looks just like the biofilm that would form in a fish tank.  It's that cloudy mass of live bacteria that most bottom feeders love to eat.  In our fish tank ours is tan in color.  Well, for me it's about the same.  Also, Tindamax and doxycycline combined are so much antibiotics for my system to handle that I must take a probiotic to balance it out.  The antibiotics kill all bacteria.  Our bodies need the good bacterial so taking probiotics helps to balance that out.  It's another reason I stay away from sugar.  Sugar feeds bad bacteria.  I don't want that.  Too much bad bacteria and I will be hurting myself and will have horrible diarrhea.  Even with the probiotics I still need another medication to help solidify my stool so I don't get too dehydrated.  So going back to my poo...  Every time I go now, which is about 6ish times a day, (much less frequent than before,) I see the Biofilms.  I'm seeing less the past two days, which I'm not sure if that's good or bad.  But I do know that Lyme morphs and can hide in your cells....  That is another place antibiotics cannot go.  They are safe in there.**

This part of my treatments....  Well, Its tough.  
When you feel so sick, pain everywhere and a headache that wax and wanes all day and night, randomly increasing to the point of migraines... It really wears on you.  The pills are doing their job.  They are killing those dang buggers... So for that I am grateful.  It's just the detoxing of their dead bacteria bodies that is hard to deal with.  I don't have the luxury of detoxing the right way and I was horrible today about drinking water.  That doesn't help.  

The past week has been so busy.  One day last week I took my youngest to Deseret Industries to look for plastic doll house pieces for her pony house.  We found a few and and two Barbie's that have the ballet clothes painted on them.  A dollar each!  Score!  We were there for 5 minutes before I regretted leaving the home.  My migraines come and go quick so as soon as one would hit I would wait it out, hoping to not throw up. I was fine.  Gracie dug through the bins and after 10 cents a toy she made out like a bandit!  Cute stuff!

Well, That day I made it home and then my son tells me he needs to get a book at the library.  I could have sent my husband...  It was his day off.  But I wanted some time with him.  It was a rough experience but my son and I were able to talk about a lot of things.  It was a crazy drive home but we enjoyed our time.


Once I returned home my headache was really bad.  It faded later on and I was feeling great by 11 pm.  Which brought me to realize that I hadn't taken my treatment yet!  No wonder why I was feeling well!  Haha!  

On Thursday I woke up to my youngest asking where her pants were.  I rolled over to point to her pile and I was extremely dizzy.  The whole room moved way too quick.  It sent me into an instant ill feeling.  I asked Grace to go get dad.  She did and when he came he put weight on my body with his hands and arms to help me gain my center.  It helped but then my back started cramping.  I was stuck in bed with a horrible motion problem for over 2 hours.  It took a few hours after I got up for everything to stop spinning completely and I'm glad it didn't last for long.  I have had over 4 dizzy spells since... mostly where I feel like I am falling.  So this adds to my already long list of symptoms especially giving reason for my MRI.  I have no idea why getting this test is so hard.  My doctor's office has been told numerous times by myself and Steinberg, to fax over my clinical history and proof of insurance. Tomorrow I will call again.  I know they are annoyed with me but it's my health and I have to stay on top of them.  I learned that a long time ago.

Well, today is SO much better.  I have good days and bad and today was definitely a good day! I had times today where my head pain was too great but I would keep singing, smiling or just say a prayer.  It really helps to pray for many reasons and it does help me to center my response to the pain.  I lasted through the whole 3 hours of church!  Barely, but I did it!  My doctor would tell me to not torture myself, but I love church!  I even subbed for my sons primary class today.  So I got to attend sharing time and sing with the kids!  We did a cool activity where the president was Moses and the kids acted out the parting of the Red Sea. I was one side of the water.  I think I played my role well...  Water is so hard to act out.  

Well, I have a new calling at church.  I'm the assistant to the Relief Society Secretary.  I am glad to be of service again.  Everyone should have a place, big or small.  It helps you to belong.  I really love my church and the gospel that teaches us to have joy.  I am so very thankful that in my times of need that the Lord is there and hears me.  I'm so thankful for so many who have helped with meals, rides, blessings, babysitting, cleaning and most of all hugs, well wishes, prayers and moral support.  It really is what is keeping me going.  That and my kids need a mom that is well!  My husband needs a wife that is well!  My friends and family need help, too!  I am excited to slowly find ways to serve more and more as I get better. 

It's a life long battle and I will never stop fighting it.  I know if it's my time then I would be eventually at peace with it but for now, nothing is gonna brake my stride!  Oh, no!  I've got to keep on movin'!  ;)



Oh, my youngest wants to add her "notes":

(GRACE is 4 years old)

4 = 2+2

2+ 3 = 5

1+1 = 2

9+1 = 10

"Grace loves mom forever and ever to the end.  Bye!"

"You Reap What You Sow"

My talk given in Sacrament meeting on March 8, 2015
Craig Ranch Ward, North Las Vegas Stake
Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints

“For the earth is full, and there is enough and to spare; yea, I prepared all things and have given unto the children of men to be agents unto themselves” (Doctrine &Covenants 104:17).

In an October 1980 General Conference address from Elder L. Tom Perry of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, it reads:

I marvel each year as I witness the system which the Lord has provided to supply for the needs of His children here on the earth. Each spring I follow a piece of string tied between two stakes to make a straight line, and with my hoe in hand I proceed to drop two or three seeds into good, fertile soil. Each fall I am overwhelmed with the bounteous harvest. Those few seeds have grown into tall plants, and each seed for the most part has produced a full golden ear containing more than a hundredfold of the original seed which was dropped into the soil a few months earlier. Each season of harvest one must be overwhelmed with humble gratitude for the blessings of the Lord to His children.

The Savior must have appreciated this process, for He used the example of this growth cycle many times as He taught in parables during His earthly ministry. We find lesson after lesson in His teachings using examples from the Lord’s supply system. We find parables concerning the sower (in Matt. 13:3–23), the seed growing by itself (in Mark 4:26–29), the tares (in Matt. 13:24–30), the unfruitful fig tree (in Luke 13:6–9), the fig tree’s leaves (in Matt. 24:32–33), treasures hidden in a field (in Matt. 13:44), and many, many others.

Is it any wonder we found His disciples teaching after His earthly ministry, (found in Gal. 6:7) “Be not deceived; God is not mocked: for whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap”.
One must be impressed with the great message of the Lord’s law of the harvest. His system produces growth, multiplication, and abundant rewards. Surely as we watch the blessings of this growth cycle each year, we would expect His children to catch the vision of their mortal potential. He has entrusted to many of His children during their earthly ministry the opportunity of caring for His special creations—His sons and His daughters. It is surely the greatest of all responsibilities which He has delegated to mankind.

In Galations 6:7 the Apostle Paul proclaimed an eternal law when he declared that “whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap.” This “law of the harvest” ties behavior and its consequences together in an unbreakable relationship that has direct impact on every aspect of our lives. 

The question arises, How do we apply this to our lives?
I am a fan of self help literature. (and yes, the scriptures fall into that category!) As I was preparing for my talk I noticed steps or a process arising besides the two of sowing and reaping.  I found 12 in fact!

12 STEPS

1st step – starts with a CHOICE  When we have the desire to grow our own gardens it begins with the choice to do so.  It’s the decision we make to do something.  This very act is a simple thing but without it, the outcome would not happen.  In our own lives, we must make this same choice for ourselves.  What do we want the outcome to be?  Do we want eternal salvation?  Do we want everlasting joy?  Do we want our families to be together forever?  Do we want all the blessings that the Lord has promised us if we but do our part?  I hope that answer is yes.  Yes, we want to be abundant in our rewards, to obtain all that we are promised and to reach the full measure of our creation. This leads us right into the next step.

2nd step – is an ETERNAL GOAL.  Now that a choice was made we have a goal in sight.  We must engrave it into our lives.  We must constantly remember the point of all the work ahead, that it has an end goal.  Just as wanting to taste the fruit of the garden we plant, we also want to partake of the fruit of ever-lasting life and the blessings that come with it. 

Making these goals is not enough; we must make a plan to carry them out.

3rd  step – is to PLAN
How do you make a plan to achieve them? In a garden, you must gather the necessary tools, seeds and materials needed to begin.  This can be applied to our lives starting by the way we live.  What tools do we currently have?  Do we have the scriptures, church resources, friends and an environment that will help us obtain these goals?  Do we need to seek out uplifting and good things?  Do we know which areas in our life need to be addressed in order to help us with certain habits we want to get rid of or to obtain?  Do we need to make some adjustments?  The great thing about a plan is it can always be adjusted as long as we start somewhere and are constantly moving forward.

Another thing to remember is time is essential—even a critical—element in your calculations. From where you stand now, it may seem that you have an indefinite amount of time to accomplish eternal things.

Everyone has time; it’s true. But just because time passes doesn't mean we are making progress.

In (Alma 34:32) it reads “This life is the time for men to prepare to meet God; yea, behold the day of this life is the day for men to perform their labors”

4th step – SEEDS
Like the flowers, fruits, and vegetables we grow in our gardens, our lives reflect the nature of the seeds we have planted.
A few of the many seeds that can help produce a good harvest in our lives are:


·         A Christ-centered life
·         Humility
·         Perspective
·         An attitude of giving
·         A desire to work
·         Service
·         Acts of kindness
·         Testimony
·         Faith
·         Self-Reliance
·         Truth
·         A love for the Temple


 Some seeds lie dormant for years; others spring forth immediately.

5th step - LOCATION so we have our seeds, where do we put them?  The answer is in the Lords territory and not in the flesh.

The Apostle Paul exhorts us about the importance of sowing in the Spirit and being aware of not sowing in the flesh. He said:

“Be not deceived; God is not mocked: for whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap.
“For he that soweth to his flesh shall of the flesh reap corruption; but he that soweth to the Spirit shall of the Spirit reap life everlasting.
“And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not” (Galatians 6:7–9).

6th  – SOWING or to plant, scatter, spread, disperse. It’s an action word.

We have heard of sowing seeds into a garden… But what does it mean to sow seeds in the Lords territory and to sow in the spirit.

It means that all our thoughts, words, and actions must elevate us to the level of the divinity of our heavenly parents. However, the scriptures refer to the flesh as the physical or carnal nature of the natural man, which allows people to be influenced by passion, desires, appetites, and drives of the flesh instead of looking for inspiration from the Holy Ghost.

If we are not careful, those influences together with the pressure of the evil in the world may conduct us to adopt vulgar and reckless behavior which may become part of our character. In order to avoid those bad influences, we have to follow what the Lord instructed the Prophet Joseph Smith about continuously sowing in the Spirit: “Wherefore, be not weary in well-doing, for ye are laying the foundation of a great work. And out of small things proceedeth that which is great” (D&C 64:33).

To enhance our spirit, it is required that we “let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from [us], with all malice” (Ephesians 4:31) and that we “be wise in the days of [our] probation [and] strip [ourselves] of all uncleanness” (Mormon 9:28).

As we study the scriptures, we learn that the promises made by the Lord to us are conditional upon our obedience and encourage righteous living. Those promises must nourish our soul, bringing us hope by encouraging us not to give up even in the face of our daily challenges of living in a world whose ethical and moral values are becoming extinct, thus motivating people to sow in the flesh even more. But how can we be certain that our choices are helping us to sow in the Spirit and not in the flesh?
President George Albert Smith, repeating counsel from his grandfather, once said: “There is a line of demarcation well defined between the Lord’s territory and the devil’s territory. If you will stay on the Lord’s side of the line you will be under his influence and will have no desire to do wrong; but if you cross to the devil’s side of that line one inch you are in the tempter’s power and if he is successful, you will not be able to think or even reason properly because you will have lost the Spirit of the Lord” (Teachings of Presidents of the Church: George Albert Smith [2011], 191).

Therefore, our daily question must be, “Do my actions place me in the Lord’s or in the enemy’s territory?”
Mormon the prophet alerted his people about the importance of having the ability to distinguish good from evil:
“Wherefore, all things which are good cometh of God; and that which is evil cometh of the devil; for the devil is an enemy unto God, and fighteth against him continually, and inviteth and enticeth to sin, and to do that which is evil continually.
“But behold, that which is of God inviteth and enticeth to do good continually” (Moroni 7:12–13).
The Light of Christ together with the companionship of the Holy Ghost must help us determine if our manner of living is placing us in the Lord’s territory or not. If our attitudes are good, they are inspired of God, for every good thing comes from God. However, if our attitudes are bad, we are being influenced by the enemy because he persuades men to do evil.
7th step – WORK or the importance of hard work, of nourishing the garden or in other words, the mind and soul.

Work is a blessing from God. It is a fundamental principle of salvation, both spiritual and temporal. When Adam was driven from his garden home, he was told that his bread must be produced by his physical toil, by the sweat of his brow. Note carefully the words found in Moses 4:23: “Cursed shall be the ground for thy sake”, that is, for his good or benefit. It would not be easy to master the earth; but that was his challenge and his blessing, as it is ours.

We are co creators with God. He gave us the capacity to do the work he left undone, to harness the energy, mine the ore, transform the treasures of the earth for our good. But most important, the Lord knew that from the crucible of work emerges the hard core of character.
Work has become a Mormon trademark. We are known throughout the world as a highly motivated, industrious people. 
We have a moral obligation to exercise our personal capabilities of mind, muscle, and spirit in a way that will return to the Lord, our families, and our society the fruits of our best efforts. To do less is to live our lives unfulfilled. It is to deny ourselves and those dependent upon us opportunity and advantage. We work to earn a living, it is true; but as we toil, let us also remember that we are building a life. Our work determines what that life will be.
Work is honorable. It is good therapy for most problems. It is the antidote for worry. Work makes it possible for the average to approach genius. What we may lack in aptitude, we can make up for in performance.
We also need to remember to prepare our own seedbed of faith. To do this we need to plow the soil through daily humble prayer, asking for strength and forgiveness. We need to harrow the soil by overcoming our feelings of pride. We need to prepare the seedbed by keeping the commandments to the best of our ability. We need to be honest with the Lord in the payment of our tithing and our other offerings. We need to be worthy and able to call forth the great powers of the priesthood to bless ourselves, our families, and others for whom we have responsibility. There is no better place for the spiritual seeds of our faith to be nurtured than within the hallowed sanctuaries of our temples and in our homes.

It seems to be part of our special nature to feel that no matter how hard you work and what you do, it is never enough.  Sometimes, despite the fact that everyone else feels you have been spectacular, you may feel inadequate and ineffective. Yet the excellent work you do, the kindness you show, and the love you exhibit are blessings beyond measure to those who have the privilege of associating with you. And it is enough.

8th step – TIME changes don’t happen in a day.  It can take a long time to see the results of what you’ve sown.

An example of this is comes from a young man on his mission.  It is not always possible to know the consequences of one single contact. For years William R. Wagstaff, who served in the North Central States Mission from 1928 to 1930, felt disappointed he had not baptized more people. In the summer of 1929 he and his companion visited a farm family about 180 miles west of Winnipeg.

“Brother Wagstaff remembered giving a copy of the Book of Mormon to the mother and discussing the gospel with her during numerous visits through that and the following summer.  “He recalled that during each visit ‘she’d take off her apron and we’d sit down and discuss the gospel. She’d read and have lots of questions.’  “But at the close of his mission, she still had not been baptized, and he lost touch with her.”
Brother Wagstaff went home, married, and raised a family. Then in October 1969 he and his wife attended his missionary reunion. “A lady approached him and asked, ‘Aren’t you Elder Wagstaff?’  “… She introduced herself as the woman he had taught on the farm outside Winnipeg. In her hand was a worn copy of the Book of Mormon—the one he had given her 40 years earlier.  “‘She showed me the book,’ he related. ‘I turned over the front and there was my name and address.’  “She then told Brother Wagstaff about 60 members of her family were members of the Church, including a branch president.” 
Elder Wagstaff planted the seed during his mission but went home while it was still in the ground. Forty years later he learned of the rich harvest that eventually had come to pass and that “whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap.” 

9th step – PERSEVERANCE
Perseverance is demonstrated by those who keep going when the going gets tough, who don’t give up even when others say, “It can’t be done.” 

Our latter-day prophets are all examples of determination through priesthood, prayer, and work. 

Joseph Smith’s perseverance made possible the Restoration of all things. All of his life he was treated with contempt and ridicule—from the time he first related the account of the First Vision to a preacher of a prominent religion. But he never faltered and left with us his unwavering testimony.

Another example was at the first press conference when President Gordon B. Hinckley was introduced to the press as the President of the Church in 1995.  He was asked what his focus would be and answered: “Carry on. Yes. Our theme will be to carry on the great work which has been furthered by our predecessors.” 

 This is a great theme for all of us. We need to carry on and endure to the end.

10th step – REPLANTING if needed
It’s important to realize that we thrive where replanting is a constant process, and when we realize that a one-time planting at the beginning doesn’t ensure a perennial harvest. Each new day should be filled with planting, cultivating, and weeding. One day missed can lead to a week, or a year, missed—and the garden may soon become overgrown with brambles and briars. However, as with gardens, neglected behaviors can be renovated with careful replanting, meticulous care, and a great deal of patience.
11th step – REAPING  or to gather, harvest, or receive. Another action!

If you plant cucumber seeds, you get cucumber vines and cucumber blossoms, and, eventually, cucumbers. You’ll never get cauliflower from cucumber seeds. If we sow acts of kindness, we reap friendship and happiness.’”

“But if we sow evil and unkindness, then we reap the consequences—unhappiness and sadness.”

For some we may be reaping what others before us have laid down before us.  Even so, in D&C 86:7, it states that the final reaping will occur only when the Father determines that the world is “fully ripe.”

12 –CONSEQUENCES a result or effect of an action or condition.  They can be good or bad.  Some of the good consequences of you harvest can be:



·         Eternal Salvation
·         Righteous families
·         Happiness
·         Joy
·         Fullness of the Gospel
·         Prospering in the land
·         Friendships
·         Peace
·         Eternal life

Only those who endure in righteousness unto the end will receive eternal life.

It is here where we experience everlasting joy.  We receive all the blessings that the Lord has promised us because we did our part. 

One of my favorite sayings is:  “We sow our thoughts, and we reap our actions; we sow our actions, and we reap our habits; we sow our habits, and we reap our characters; we sow our characters, and we reap our destiny.”

I pray that our harvest will be blessed with the fullness the Lord has promised to us because we have lived worthy of meriting His blessings.   He lives to lead and guide and bless us with His love.
May we be blessed with the faith to follow His way, which will lead us to life eternal, I humbly pray in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.


Wednesday, March 4, 2015

Hanging by a thread... But still hanging!

I don't usually brag about myself, but Herxing, detoxing, being sick, taking care of 4 kids including pets, a home, my sick and recovering hubby, (bless his heart and thankfully he is better...) 

I would say I'm handling it very well....

So far.  I will let you know if I crack!   Haha!  Or maybe you will figure it out on your own!!

Well, today was an adventure.  My husband now knows what it's like to pass a kidney stone.  We have something else in common!  Yea us!  Well, I will write about it once I get permission from him.  He is usually more of a private man and I understand so if he's ok, I will share the experience.  But I agree with him.  Going through this definitely gives you empathy toward others when it comes to pain.

He is one tough cookie.  

Tuesday, March 3, 2015

White blood count is back up!

This will be a quick entry.  I don't feel well and need to sleep.  I think I am getting sick.  My youngest two have been sick and my hubby is getting it, too.  

Anyhow, my appointment today at CIDS went well.  My test results for my white blood count are up to 3.8 so that's great!  I can wean off the steroids now.  I was prescribed Tindamax again and hopefully it will knock this bacteria out.  It will mean stronger Herxes but I am ready for it.  We are still working on getting the MRI of my brain done so hopefully that will be soon, too.  If so then I go back in 2 weeks.

I want to do a separate post about my supplement routine this time around.  But like I said, I need to sleep for now.  Thanks everyone for your continued support and prayers.  It means so much to me!